Scotland, Just for a Laugh

This trip is two years in the making, twice postponed by COVID-19 and the many travel restrictions that came with it. But finally, Taylor and I find ourselves in Salt Lake City airport, waiting to board a very long flight to Amsterdam, continuing on to Edinburgh. There has been some confusion on the airline's part as to the type of upgraded seating I think I have paid for and I am frustrated. But moments later a call comes over the intercom that there are a few business class upgrades available at what seems, at the time, like a reasonable price for the chance to lie down flat during an almost nine-hour red-eye flight. We discuss it for exactly two seconds and then speed-walk to the counter in the knick of time to claim the last two spots. My hands shake as I hand over my credit card. But this is the first time an enhanced flight experience to Europe at a "reasonable" price has presented itself, and I justify it to myself with the knowledge that I'll arrive at my destination a little less wrecked than usual after a long-haul flight. 

As soon as we get to our pod-like seats, we know we've made the right decision. Our seats have fluffy pillows, blankets, and a small locker with water and an amenities bag inside. The amenities include basic toiletries, sleep aids like eye masks and ear plugs, and even a pair of socks! We also have large screens with an array of movies, TVs, and even video games to keep us occupied during the trip. As people are settling in, the bubbly Dutch flight attendants come around and offer drinks. Taylor weighs his options, then selects a glass of champagne, and we both giggle at how fun and ridiculous this all is. The people around us must travel this way a lot, because no one else seems as excited as we are.

Our pods have menus showing our dinner and breakfast options. We didn't realize dinner would be served on this flight, so we have already eaten, and I regret it a bit because the menu contains fucking caviar, among other things. But I have paid a pretty penny to get some shut-eye, so I don't dwell on it, and instead snuggle down into my pod. It's still not a bed, and I shift around constantly trying to get comfortable, but ultimately I'm able to kill at least half of the flight time in restless sleep. And when I wake up, I'm rewarded with a rich breakfast of way too much food.

KLM Business Class Menu

A filling KLM breakfast on real plates with real cutlery in the dim blue cabin lighting.

Amsterdam is an easy layover, and I'm reminded why I like to travel in Europe and on European airlines. It's not the dehumanizing experience that traveling in the US is. Security is sufficient, but easy, and they don't waste time with a lot of authoritative measures that just make travel more frustrating but no more safe. Our flight from Amsterdam to Edinburgh is a quick hour, and we spend it glued to the window, trying to catch a glimpse of this new geography. The sweet, cheerful man in the aisle seat of our row notices our excitement and engages us about our trip. He wishes us happy travels and it only adds to our anticipation.

At last we've landed in Edinburgh, collected our luggage after a long wait, and located an Uber into the city. The driver is a maniac and I immediately decide that, despite not having any experience driving here, I'm sure I can do it better than him (this will be put to the test in a few days). The city is just as beautiful as promised, with dark brown, old stone buildings and cobbled streets. And these are just the outskirts. We arrive at our AirBnB apartment, a spacious and clean canal-side space, and unburden ourselves of our luggage.

We're both hungry, so we venture out to a nearby Tesco convenience store for a few recommended goodies. The layout of the store is kind of bewildering, as there seems to be candy and snack foods on every single aisle, posed next to various other goods like vegetables and laundry detergent. The store is aswarm with people and we keep having to step out of the paths of those who know what they want and where it is. We notice many vegan options, which we were not expecting. At last we make our selections and head out in search of a real meal, eating vegan ice cream bars as we stroll in the fresh evening air.

Scottish snack staples: Irn Bru (orange soda), tablet (a dry fudge-like caramel), and Tunnock's caramel wafer biscuits.

Almost immediately we stumble upon Sofia's Lounge, a stylish casual Lebanese restaurant. Taylor is somewhat unfamiliar with this cuisine, but I sing its praises, so we go in and have a delicious, hearty meal of falafel, baba ghanoush, grilled lamb kebab, and a lamb meatball stew. Bellies full, we head back to the apartment for a shower and (hopefully) a full night's sleep.